Most women have heard what ‘giving birth’ is; they hear it from their mothers, sisters, grandmothers, friends- even strangers…My idea of birth was simply: I’ve heard about it a lot from a lot of people but I don’t know what it is. Like what it really is. Yes, I do have one child, David John who is almost two years old and whom I had via Cesarean section because of his breached presentation. I had planned a natural birth… but it didn’t go as planned. I finally came to peace with that and viewed my firstborn son’s birth as special and as brave and strong as my second born child. It took an interesting series of events in my future to help me to make peace with my past. His birth story started when David John was only about 4 months old.
I switched my PCP to Dr. Punger and as part of a welcome gift into her practice I received her book, called “Permission to Mother.” After reading the book my eyes opened wide on how certain situations work in the health care system. I also started to read articles about the c-section way of giving birth and how it affects women in general.
This subject started to be very close to my heart because I went through it myself! One thing I learned is that the hospital where I had my C-Section at declines VBACs (or Vaginal Birth After C-section). Each hospital makes their own risk assessment and sets guidelines for labor and delivery. Well, this is not cool. I really don’t like the idea that I can’t even try to have my second child naturally, how God meant for us to have it in the first place because my baby flipped around (breeched) prior to my due date a few years prior.
Looking back, prior to Luke’s birth, I wish I done more to try and prevent the C-Section- and now it seems like, to many hospitals, since I went C-Section I should always go with C-Section, from here on out. Learning all the risks vs. benefits of a VBAC vs. a repeat Cesarean birth, I made my mind up that when I get pregnant again I will have my baby in my living room in the area where I love spending time with my family… but how would that happen?
As soon as I got pregnant, I made an appointment with my physician who referred me to 3 different midwives. I had already in mind of choosing Birth Blossoms because I’ve heard great success stories from my co-worker who had her second VBAC at home and it was Birth Blossoms whom did the delivery.
I made an appointment with Hailey and Mary and after my initial appointment my husband and I agreed that we want to be with them and have them help us to deliver our baby number 2!
Working in the hospital I got to hear many reasons why I shouldn’t have a VBAC at home- yes it is a risk, but so is the repeat C-Section. Statistics were in my favor. Having midwives taking care of you during pregnancy is like having friends and sisters who care for you and support you and they never hesitate to address things when they come up. My risk score was high enough that I needed to see a ‘high-risk perinatologist’ to give me clearance that I could have a baby naturally. With a few visits and a healthy amount of prayer I finally got approved for my VBAC!
The ‘serpent voices’ (as I like to call all the doubting thoughts that were projected on me throughout my pregnancy) were just voices that I had to shut down with reliance on the One who created me in such a wonderful way that I could bring a child into this world… the way He intended me to have…
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. Hebrews 10:35
With many other verses from Scripture this was a huge anchor in my faith, all the way until the day of the birth of my son. I will post a few more at the end for encouragement, too as they were in the YouVersion Bible app in the days leading up to the birth. If there are any good examples of words having power, it’s these.
January 12th, 2019. My labor started about 7 pm in the evening. Since I worked all the way until the day before my labor started, I was behind on my “nestling”. Praise God my mom flew into town and she was able to help me to prepare; I still had a few things needing to be done for the birth!
Since I was oblivious to what contractions are (because people can only describe them to you so much), I asked my mom if lower back pain at regular intervals could be those contractions; she said “yes!”
I started to pay attention to them- and I decided they were just regular contractions- not intense, just regular. I decided to give a call to my midwife, just to give her ‘heads up’ in case things were to progress faster- I mean, I don’t know the speed of these things- and thank God I did. I reached Hailey right away and to both of us it sounded like it was the Braxton-Hicks contractions.
So… I made a plan to finish the prepping for birth and asked my husband to get a few last items we needed from Walgreens for the birth, then have dinner and then relax and have tea with honey. Sounds good, right?
My husband and I were working through all the details of the set up for the birth as well as my mom and I were finishing up the nursery corner in my bedroom. It was a busy evening; while rushing through all of that I realized my contractions were less like “baby contractions” that weren’t really for real and more like real contractions for the baby! At one point Derek left the house to go to Walgreens and my mom and I stayed behind, continuing on finishing the last touches prior to us being to relax a little. My contractions progressively were more regular and more intense but stayed short, about 20-30 seconds long.
At 12:01 at night I felt a thump in my stomach and I felt like I had some fluids coming out of me. I called my mom over and asked her if she thinks it was my water breaking. She said ‘yes!’ and for some reason I didn’t think I was in labor- I was just thinking it was still Braxton Hicks contractions, just more regular, but sure enough… my water had broke!
It’s 12:51 in the morning and I am giving a call to my midwife Hailey, telling her my water broke. At this point my contractions required me to stop talking and just concentrate on ‘feeling’ through them and enjoy the rest I get right after them! Hailey told me she will be over at my house within one hour.
I text my husband “my water broke” and he texted back saying “what does that mean?” I simply replied “Hailey is coming over!” I think that said it all.
As the contractions were getting stronger I put the lights in the house dimmer, put on soft music, got lavender oil diffusing and just waited for everyone to arrive while rocking side to side, standing on my feet through each contraction. Derek showed up with all the necessary last-minute things we need for birth at home. Then, shortly after that, Hailey arrived with her equipment. Hailey did her vitals check and was able to assess me and tell me that I am quite far along in the labor process (later I learned that I was about 8 cm at that point).
Seems like after she showed up the contractions decided to take it up 10 notches! Yeah, at this point I didn’t have as a strong of a focus and got a bit more vocal now. My husband, seeing this and under Hailey’s instruction, started to set up the birth pool. For blowing it up he had a loud air compressor- at first I thought the loud noise will really bother me but it turns out it helped me to deal with pain, plus I didn’t feel as self conscious and was able to get louder as the contractions went on! It didn’t take me long to get fully dilated and start to feel the urge to push…
At this point the concept of time started to get distorted (what a gift it is, especially going through strong labor pains). It seemed like Hailey had to change me from one position to another as I was progressing. I really have a hard time recollecting when Yolanda (the midwife assistant) showed up. Her and Hailey worked together trying to keep me as comfortable as they could. They make a great team! Seems like I was able to observe what’s going on in between the surges and that time was getting shorter and shorter…
About 2:30 in the morning, I felt the desire to have Yolanda place one hand on each side of my body, below the waist and push. After Hailey convinced me to change my position I was able to scream… and scream out my child I did! Yep, I did scream through my labor- I feel bad looking back on it for my husband, supporting me so well and my mom- they had to hear it… but I quickly realized that it was the only way at that point I could really deal with my labor pain.
At 2:35, he entered out into our living room, just as I had imagined. I can’t believe that right after my child entered this world, full-term and fully visible, I was able to hold him close to me and call him my baby!
I kept my confidence in God helping me through my home VBAC and He rewarded me with a short, successful labor of a baby boy weighing at 8 pounds 8 ounces and 20.5 inches long- complications free! So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. Hebrews 10:35
P.S. I didn’t get a chance to use the birth pool- no complaints there!
I did get my tea with honey right after I had my baby! Sweet, yes, but as I’ve found, not nearly as sweet as life itself.
“I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13 NIV
“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”
